It is a warm and humid afternoon. The leaves are still moist with the morning dew. Church services have just ended, and we stop at my mother-in-law’s house. She always wants a picture of us in our Sunday’s best.
My daughters are wearing their special monogrammed dresses. I had spent much more on those dresses than I ever had before, but this Easter was special. It was different.
I see the smile on my face, and I recognize the false bravado I’m trying to conceal. I am very thin and pale. I have cancer.
I notice my husband’s grip on me - almost as though he is trying to keep me from falling. I see the fear in his eyes and the sadness in his heart.
My older daughter has just learned of my illness, and something in her expression displays her concern, while my baby, Ashlyn, has no consciousness of her mommy being sick.
I recall how weak I felt and how strong I knew I had to be for them. I remember wondering if this my last Easter picture with my family.
Melissa Shields, 1998
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